Empty suddenly..

*Sigh* Starting of the blog ~ I already *sigh*.. Means this post is written when I am really really sad and confuse..
I really don't understand.. How people can use other people.. To accomplish their stuff.. This really SUCK ! A lot people seems to be treating you good.. But at the back.. I bet 9/10 people is backstabbing.. Once I think of that.. I ask myself.. I treat them not good enough? Or I am just a tool for them? I think this problems not only occur on me.. If anyone have any solution to solve this problems.. I am begging for advice.. Sometimes worse.. is that the person you liked.. Treat you the same way like what I say.. I am very very empty in my head and my heart.. What I should do...?
Should I just quit being friends with them? I thought I am quite a OKAY person.. Which can communicate with anyone.. But then now I lack of confidence even talking to someone I know a long long time.. I need to think a lot before talking.. I scared later just because one wrong word.. Another backstabber.. I am actually now quite confuse.. I really don't understand.. Why my friend don't understand me.. They knew me for 4 years.. Now I just being a fans of a kid and I like playing with kids.. They ask me.. Am I homosexual? Then I say ~ You all guess...? They think I am.. !! WTF?!? I am so disappointed.. Can't believe it.. Now more and more people saying I am homosexual.. Hurt me a lot.. Maybe I really will turn into one.. *Sigh*
God ! Tell me what to do...? If liking kids making you a homosexual.. Should I hate kids? And not go near to kid at all? I do love cute kids a lot though.. So what you all think? Tell me some advice if possible ~ Thank you ! I hope all people can be true.. Not faker.. God bless..